Downloadapalooza Vol. 1: Briscoe vs. Briscoe, Honda vs. Kobashi, Low Ki vs. Danielson

So looking over my downloads, I realized something; I could do one hell of a review with what I’ve got. I mean, I haven’t done very many that aren’t total shows, but putting together several matches out of every promotion I could get, I figured what the hell. So I’ll show my gratitude by reviewing downloaded matches that were said to be great, but often times I have a different opinion than most, so we’ll see how shit ends up.

Title vs. Mask for IC Title: Chris Jericho © vs. Rey Mysterio

From The Bash 2009. These two had a dandy of a feud in 2009, during Smackdown’s total-fucking-radness phase. Jericho was what he’d always been; the best in the effing world, and Rey Mysterio shut up a lot of doubters with his awesome performances in these matches. I’m one of those guys who supports Rey-Rey no matter what he does. His knees are stale hamburgers, sure, but he still has a great grasp of character psychology and can always get the crowd behind him. Jericho had become the best character in wrestling, using big-ass words like troglodyte (go ahead and say it multiple times…I’ll wait) and just shitting on the crowd in sophisticated ways. He was over as a heel, and everyone loves Rey Mysterio (if you’re a mark that is) so add the greatly divided lines with two spectacular workers, and you have a supposed top three MOTYC. Will I think the same? You’re intrigued.

Rey comes out looking like a zebra. Because of course he does, he’s Rey goddamn Mysterio. And Chris Jericho comes out being a quiet, non-Y2J dude like he had been. You can already tell this shall rule. JR and Todd Grisham, one of the more underrated announce teams in the past couple years, are on commentary for this one. I FUCKING MISS JR. Michael Cole is a doucheface of the highest order and I want him to leave. Yes, even worse than Hermie, but even then, Hermie’s better with Nigel at the desk with him.

We start with a tie up. Jericho targets the mask early. Jericho taunts Rey as he puts in a side headlock. Shoulder block by Jericho to huge heat. He eats Rey’s boot in the corner and Rey hits a diving hurricanrana. Jericho reverses a baseball slide and rams Rey’s head into the barricade on the outside. Back in the ring, Jericho hits a boston crab/guillotine in the ropes. Jericho nails a vertical suplex for a two count. The crowd tries to rally Mysterio out of a chinlock, but Jericho takes control and sets him on the top rope. Jericho is trying to go after the mask again, but Mysterio knocks him off. Mysterio nails a seated senton, but Jericho totally no-sells it and hits a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker for two. Jericho works over Rey in the corner. He knocks Rey out of the ring and taunts the crowd, who in turn boos him out of the building. Back in, Rey reverses a suplex, but Jericho quickly nails a dropkick for two. Mysterio powers out of a rest hold and breaks it with some kicks and sends Jericho flying through the second rope. Mysterio comes off the top with a seated senton to the outside! Pretty swift looking spot if I do say so myself. Back in the ring, Rey hits a crossbody for two. Double springboard moonsault! One, two, no. Great spot that you don’t see Rey do anymore. Jericho reverses a springboard moonsault into a powerslam for a nearfall. Rey hits a moonsault for two! Jericho counters a rana into Walls of Jericho! Mysterio eventually gets to the ropes, and the crowd EXPLODES! Rey misses 619 and Jericho MAULS him with a clothesline. Rey kicks Jericho up top, but JERICHO REVERSES A FRANKENSTEINER INTO A POWERBOMB! One, two, no! His feet were on the ropes. This is starting to get awesome. Mysterio gets a rana pin for two. Jericho reverses a 619 into his spinning backbreaker, but Rey SPINS INTO A DDT! One, two, nope. AWESOME counter there. Jericho misses a clothesline, but Mysterio springboards and Jericho NAILS A CODEBREAKER! One, two, NO! Great nearfall. Jericho takes Rey to the top, but Chris misses a Frankensteiner. 619 by Rey! JERICHO REVERSES INTO WALLS OF JERICHO~! Mysterio looks for a sunset flip, and they trade nearfalls. Jericho takes Rey’s mask off, BUT HE HAS ANOTHER ONE! 619, body splash, one, two, three! Match was 16 minutes. AWESOME finish to a killer match.

                                                                                                                                  

Analysis: ****1/4 Man, what a display of counters in this match. They played off of their previous matches extremely well while also incorporating some new, better spots to cap off a heated, fun feud. Jericho got to play the bully in this match, and he excelled by getting monster heat from the crowd and ragdolling Rey around like he was nothing. The psychology with the mask escalated throughout, blending into the excellently clever finish with the second mask. These two pretty much have a three star outing every time they step into the ring together, and this is probably the best match I’ve seen them wrestle so far. Track this one down, because it’s a top five MOTYC for 2009, like most said.

FCW 15 Title Match: Seth Rollins © vs. Dean Ambrose; 30 Minute Iron Man

People have been hyping this bastard up like crazy, and considering the talent involved, it wouldn’t surprise me if it were one of the better outings of the year. Seth Rollins (aka Tyler Black for you indies-only fans) has been one of the best wrestlers to get to FCW in a while, but I don’t think he’s a great talker. Dean Ambrose? Oh, this guy has it ALL. He is a superstar in the making, my friends. He has a one of a kind style on the microphone, cutting some of the most unique promos seen in years. He also is one hell of a wrestler, which surprised me after first seeing him, considering he’d been apart of a lot of stupid ultraviolent shitbags. But rest assured, he’s just a one-of-a-kind talent and if WWE can let him loose like they did Punk, he’ll do a lot of good business for them.

This feud started right out of the gate, in which Ambrose called out Seth Rollins in his debut promo. They wrestled for the 15 title (MEDAL!~!) two times: the usual 15 minute Iron Man match was wrestled to a draw and their next match, a 20 minute Iron Man, ended with a draw. So the solution? Add ten minutes on that motherfucker and watch them go! My download is the whole show, so there are plenty of interviews making this seem like the most important match in FCW history. It really brings off kind of an indy vibe to me, with all of the formal interviews and hype surrounding it. Certainly got me hyped to see it, so what will happen?

So Cameron Lynn is the ring announcer for this one, and she flubs her lines. She was the infamous girl on Tough Enough who said her favorite match was Melina vs. Alicia Fox. And she’s a dancer for THE FUNKASAURUS!~! Her voice is so awfully annoying and it makes me sad that she couldn’t just, ya know, strip or something. I mean, she’s hot in a weird way, but nothing I’d really wanna delve into, for lack of a better phrase.

We start with a tie-up, but they break after a few seconds. They trade waistlocks, but Ambrose heads to the ropes to break Seth’s hold on him. Ambrose rolls through an arm wringer and dodges Avada Kedavra, Rollins’ superkick finisher. We already take a commercial break, but my download has no commercials. HA. We’re back with Rollins working on Dean’s arm at 26:00. Rollins hits a leg sweep, Ambrose kicks out at one, and Rollins puts in another armbar. Rollins goes to work on the arm with a keylock drop. Ambrose nails chops in the corner, all while selling his arm. He ties Seth up in the ropes and hits an open hand chop. Ambrose works Rollins over slowly and the corner, but Rollins kicks out of a pinfall attempt at one. Seth starts coming back with some stiff chops, seesawing Ambrose within the second rope. Rollins kicks him out of the ring. They brawl on the outside. Back in the ring, Rollins works Dean over in the corner as we pass the 22 minute mark. Ambrose dodges a dropkick and kicks Rollins in the balls for the DQ win at 21 minutes.. Rollins leads 1-0. Ambrose hits the Midnight Special (emerald flowsion variant) for the three count. We are tied 1-1 with 20 and a half minutes left. Really good throwback to Lesnar/Angle there. Ambrose nails a lariat for a three count! Ambrose leads 2-1 with 20 minutes left. Ambrose nails another lariat, but Rollins rolls out of the ring. We head to another commercial break. We’re back with 17 minutes left and Ambrose has Seth in a modified surfboard. Ambrose puts in a neck crank. Rollins attempts a comeback, but Ambrose targets the neck and foils that quickly. The two trade chops, but Ambrose hits a nice looking facebuster for two. We are halfway through. Ambrose shows good charisma by taunting the crowd and dancing in the middle of the ring. Rollins replies with a slap. Ambrose looks for the Midnight Special but Rollins rolls through with a sunset flip for three with 14 minutes left. We are tied 2-2. Rollins comes out like a house on fire. Ambrose dodges a curb stomp, and heads to the outside. SOMERSAULT PLANCHA FROM ROLLINS! Man, that looked pretty. Rollins smacked his head on the guardrail though. Back in the ring, Rollins nails Ambrose with a kick to the head, and Rollins nails a springboard clothesline! One, two, no! Ambrose dodges Avada Kedavra. Rollins floats over a suplex but eats Ambrose’s boot. Ambrose HITS A SICK SUPLEX TO THE OUTSIDE! We head to another commercial break at 10 minutes. We’re back with 8 minutes left. The two are brawling it out inside the ring. Ambrose smiles as Rollins stiffs the bejesus out of him. Rollins gets FUCKED IN THE FACE with a slap, but comes back with a Pele kick! Rollins gets a slow pin, ONE, TWO, thr—NO! Awesome nearfall. Rollins hits a Lionsault, one, two, thr—NO! Whew, this match is great. Rollins nails a series of step kicks, ADVANCED CURB STOMP! ONE, TWO, THR—NO!!! Damn it, dude. We have 5 minutes left. Rollins MISSES A PHOENIX SPLASH! Wow, that was beautiful! He seems to have not done that in FCW as the commentators sell surprise. That was one of his ROH finishers. Ambrose covers, ONE, TWO, THR—NO! Wow. This crowd fucking sucks, but these are great nearfalls to an awesome match. Ambrose is having trouble staying up, and Rollinsn tries to elbow out of a cloverleaf. Ambrose is just stomping on Seth’s gut right now. Rollins puts in the cloverleaf! Ambrose sits on it in the center of the ring. Rollins tries to power to the ropes, AND HE GETS THEM! We have 1 minute left in this one. Ambrose taunts Rollins in the corner and looks for Avada Kedavra, but ROLLINS NAILS THE MIDNIGHT SPECIAL!!! ONE, TWO, THR—NO!!  ROLLINS NAILS AVADA KEDAVRA!    ~! ONE, TWO, THR—NO!!! The time limit expires. FUCK. But wait, Maxine gives us sudden death! THANK YOU. Rollins puts in a small package, ONE, TWO, THR—NO! They just slug it out in the ring! Ambrose nails a running knee for a close nearfall. This crowd blows ass. They just stay quiet for the nearfalls. Rollins sends Ambrose out with a kick, nails an ELBOW SUICIDA! Rollins nails forearms in the ring, but Ambrose gives him one of his own! ROLLINS NAILS A SUPERKICK! AMBROSE NAILS A LARIAT! One, two, thr—NO!!! MIDNIGHT SPECIAL! ONE, TWO, THR—NO!! Fucking hell, this match is seven shades of amazing. Rollins kicks Ambrose off of the second rope and climbs to the top rope, and Ambrose looks for a super Midnight Special, but ROLLINS HITS AVADA KEDAVRA!~! AMBROSE GETS UP! Another superkick and GOD’S LAST GIFT! ONE, TWO, THREE! Holy balls. Match was 35 minutes.

Analysis: ****3/4 Whew. That was probably one of the most exciting 35 minute matches I’ve ever seen. Ambrose brought the character psychology early, taunting the crowd and trying to get inside Rollins’ head, but Rollins persevered and came out victorious. Surprisingly, Dean sold the arm throughout the whole match, which is something you never see anymore. Rollins showed really great maturity from the last time I’d seen him in FCW. He is really one of the best wrestlers in the world right now, and if you need any proof further, just watch this match. He hits his moves with such crispness that it makes you kind of frown upon a lot of his ROH matches because from what I’d seen with an opponent that weren’t Danielson or Richards, he showed a penchant for being sloppy. There was none of that here, and it made the match better. Ambrose showed that he has one hell of a grip on psychology that a lot of wrestlers don’t have nowadays. That will get him over for sure when WWE calls him up. The only reasons for me not going the full monty were the unwelcome commercials and the shitty crowd. I mean seriously, anywhere else, that match would have God himself popping for the nearfalls, which were some of the best I’ve seen in a long time. Yeah, it’s only FCW, but you put this match in a city like New York, Chicago, or even LA, that crowd would have pissed themselves by now. But this match was so good, that the crowd barely hurt it. So yeah, track this bastard down. It’s on Youtube, but I can’t type and do the Youtube thing, because it freezes up so I downloaded it. Just a killer match, the best I’ve seen Ambrose wrestle. If it weren’t for Rollins’ match with Davey Richards at Death Before Dishonor VIII, this would be his best.

NWA World Title Match: Adam Pearce © vs. Brent Albright

From ROH Death Before Dishonor VI. The only thing the video lets on here is that Albight had a history with Larry Sweeney and his goons, but something happened and now he’s feuding with them. I remember Albright from being Gunnar Scott in WWE for a cup of coffee. I’ve seen Pearce wrestle before and I can’t say I was impressed, but it’s not like I’ve seen enough to have a formidable opinion.

Adam Pearce plays a total dickhead heel in this match, being all old school and stuff. His gimmick it seems is him thinking he’s on Ric Flair’s level since he’s NWA champ. He plays a good old school heel. Also, we’re in the Hammerstein Ballroom for this one, and the lighting looks a whole shit ton better here than it did at Best in the World and Final Battle this year. This one is under NWA rules naturally, so throwing your opponent over the top is a DQ.

We start with a tie up, but they break quickly. Pearce is knocked down with a shoulderblock. Albright gets dragged out to the floor, but Albright mauls Bobby Dempsey. Albright stiffs Pearce into the ropes. “YOU GOT BITCHSLAPPED” chant, which is one of my personal favorite chants. They trade waistlocks. Albright rolls out of an armbar and locks in a headscissors. He bridges up from a pin attempt and bitch slaps Pearce again. Cue another “YOU GOT BITCHSLAPPED” chant. Pearce gets downed again as Albright attacks him in the corner. Albright nails some slick looking jabs, but Pearce sends his throat into the top rope. Pearce just spits in the ref’s face as he tries to stop Pearce from biting Albright. Albright is already busted open. Pearce tries to open the cut some more and taunts the Manhattan crowd. Pearce targets the knee after foiling an Albright comeback. Pearce is just playing a great old school heel. Pearce sends Albright out to the floor and tries to open his cut some more. Pearce runs Albright into the barricade and brings the mats up to expose the concrete. Albright catapults Pearce into the ringpost, and now Pearce blades. Albright heads back into the ring. Larry Sweeney looks to nail Albright with a chair to get Pearce DQ’d, but Roderick Strong  comes in and hits a Sick Kick on Sweeney! He sends Pearce in the ring, and Albright goes crazy on him. The crowd explodes at that. Albright hits a Tiger Feint knee, but Pearce comes back with a figure four! Albright gets to the ropes eventually. Pearce eats Albright’s knee, but Pearce MASSACRES him with a lariat for two. Albright gets a roll up for two, and after that hits a powerslam for 2. Pearce waffles Albright with a right hand and nails a back suplex. Pearce goes up top for an Awesome Splash, and nails it. One, two, no! Pearce goes right into an STF. Albright counters into a crowbar! Pearce’s feet slip under the ropes. Albright goes up top, but PEARCE SENDS HIM THROUGH THE TABLE! Pearce pulls him back in and nails a piledriver! One, two, thr—NO! Crowd and I were certainly sold on that one! The crowd starts getting mad into this one. Albright nails a half nelson suplex! Albright can’t get to the cover, so the ref starts the double 10 count. He hits another one! One, two, NO!! Wow, that was a good nearfall. They get to their knees and exchange shots! BOO for Pearce, YEAHH for Albright. They slug it out on the feet now, and Albright nails a german suplex! Another, another, and another! Albright hits a fifth german! One, two, thr—NO! Albright goes up top. Pearce rolls throught a sunset flip, but Albright gets a small package! ONE, TWO, NO! Crowbar! Pearce taps at 18 minutes. Great match.

Analysis: ***3/4 This was a really good match, but it was missing something. I can’t quite put my finger on it, but there was still something missing. It might be the abrupt finish, but who knows. With that said, this was a great old school match that combined old school mannerisms (Pearce) with some new moves and it worked well. I’ve seen some people rate this very close to five stars, and I think that’s just insane. They worked well together and it was enjoyable, but the finishing stretch wasn’t all that hot, with the exception of a few good nearfalls that had me legitimately sold. The crowd was WAY into it, which is surprising since I haven’t seen either guy get much of a reaction in ROH, but it is a Manhattan crowd, so there you go.

GHC Heavyweight Title: Kenta Kobashi © vs. Tamon Honda

Kenta Kobashi is just a monster of course, and Tamon Honda is apparently a midcarder who got a big shot going up against Mr. Kobashi, but I have a feeling he won’t get out in one piece. Tamon Honda is a pretty pasty Japanese guy, but he has a cool beard. And Kenta Kobashi is KENTA FUCKING KOBASHI.

Kobashi overpowers with a tie up early on. They stand off after Honda shoves off a spear. Mitsuharu Misawa is on commentary, but damned if I can understand anything. Honda and Kobashi trade waistlocks until Honda hits a two suplexes, much to the crowd’s surprise. Kobashi rises with a front facelock. Honda rolls through with a leglock, so Kobashi latches one on and they take turns wrenching the respective legs. Honda goes to work on Kobashi’s leg, but Kenta quickly stops that by locking in an armbar. Kobashi nails an impressive delayed vertical suplex soon after. Honda gets to the ropes after succumbing to a chinlock, but quickly falls victim to an abdominal stretch. Honda tries to reverse, but Kobashi shuts him down and puts in a headlock. This is probably the most vicious headlocks I’ve ever seen as Kobashi is just squishing Tamon’s head. Tamon gets out of it with a backdrop driver, but eats a Russian legsweep seconds later. Kobashi puts in a pretty spiffy hooked full-nelson. They head to the outside where Kobashi drops a couple legdrops on Tamon’s head, which is stuck on the second rope. Kenta follows that with a pretty vicious DDT on the ramp. Honda sandbags on a suplex to the inside and HONDA NAILS A FUCKING GERMAN ON THE RAMP!! Awesome, awesome spot and the usually quiet Japanese crowd roars in approval at it. In the ring, 1, 2, no! Honda goes to work with an arm wringer. Honda foils a reversal and DROPS DOWN WITH A VICIOUS CROSS ARMBREAKER! Kobashi starts flailing and finally gets to the ropes. Honda goes to work on Kobashi’s arm on the outside. Back in the ring, Honda rolls through a half nelson suplex and puts in another armbar! Kobashi gets to the ropes and puts Honda in a sleeper! Honda gets out of a suplex with a cutter and goes back to the arm. Kobashi’s all FUCK YOU BITCH and shakes off a lariat, hitting a backdrop driver. Honda still fights back. Kobashi drops him on his head, but HONDA IS UP! Kobashi tries to choke him out, but Honda hits a suplex. HALF NELSON SUPLEX!~! ANOTHER ONE!~! ONE, TWO, THR—NO!~! Son of a bitch, what a nearfall. Honda get dropped square on the top of his head. Those were absolutely vicious. Honda gets out of a rolling chop and HITS A TAZMISSION SUPLEX!~! He locks on a variation of the Tazmission and Kobashi looks to be fading! Honda drops Kobashi with another suplex and hits a pumphandle powerbomb! One, two, no! Honda goes up top and HITS A FUCKING SUPER GERMAN SUPLEX!~! ONE, TWO, THR—NO!!!!! I bought that one. Honda puts in an STF! He chickenwings that fucker! ARM TRIANGLE! Tamon WRENCHES IT! Kobashi stays alive! One, two, thr—no! Shit, what a match. Honda hits an avalanche in the corner and looks for a superbomb, but Kobashi ranas him! BURNING LARIAT! ONE, TWO, THR—NO!! HONDA HITS A SPEAR! GERMAN SUPLEX! KOBASHI’S UP! BURNING LARIAT AGAIN! Kobashi isn’t done, BUT HONDA CRADLES HIM! ONE, TWO, THR—NO! HALF NELSON SUPLEX!~! ONE, TWO, NO!! BURNING LARIAT! ONE, TWO, THREE! Match was 25 minutes

Analysis: ****1/2 Holy hell what a match. The nearfalls here were the best I’ve seen in any match. It had you believing that even though Honda didn’t seem to stand a chance, he just might have been able to pull off the unthinkable. That’s the kind of wrestling that grabs you in and makes you enjoy the product. Kobashi was just a tough bastard and all signs pointed to Honda getting squashed like a fly, but damn if Kobashi didn’t underestimate him. It was probably the oldest story in wrestling, but also one of the best: the tough, killer champion underestimates his opponent who nearly beats him on several occasions because of it. It is a simply but highly effective story and it was done to perfection in this match. I have no doubt that if something like this happened in say, WWE, where a little guy like Tyson Kidd or Trent Beretta just took John Cena or Randy Orton to the limit, they would be stars. It won’t happen, but it would have one hell of an effect. I can’t imagine any of the fans at the arena that night didn’t think better of Tamon Honda. His performance was spectacular, as was Kobashi’s, who always delivers anyway. This was just an amazing match, a worthy successor of Kobashi’s five star affairs that were part of his GHC title reign in the mid-2000’s.

Round Robin Challenge, Match #3: Bryan Danielson vs. Low Ki

From ROH Round Robin Challenge in 2002. Dragon and Low Ki had already had their coming-out party at The Era of Honor Begins with the awesome three way between those two and Christopher Daniels. Round Robin Challenge was ROH’s second show and was heralded as their best show of 2002, but I haven’t seen any 2002 shows in full. As a matter of fact, I’ve never seen this match before, so I’m going in with no spoilers. Yay.

Before the match starts, Ken Shamrock comes out and says he’s gonna referee. Can’t tell that dude no, can ya? I still don’t think he would punch as hard as Low Ki kicks. Just kidding. Maybe.

Low Ki begins by kicking Dragon in the leg. Low Ki gets out of a cross armbreaker, but Danielson puts on a can opener early. Low Ki mounts Dragon and elbows him through the mat. Low Ki takes control further with a bodyscissors, but Danielson turns over and puts in Billy Goat’s Curse. Dragon foils a Low Ki comeback with a headlock. Dragon stiffs the fuck out of Low Ki with some forearms. Low Ki rolls through to a front facelock, but Danielson blocks a kick soon after. Danielson uses Low Ki’s wild forearms to put in a crucifix armbar. Danielson gets out of a triangle choke with a powerbomb, the first impactful move so far, 7 minutes in. Still a great mat wrestling clinic so far though. Dragon stretches Low Ki with a modified STF, but Low Ki gets to the ropes. Low Ki DECKS Dragon with a feint kick to the face. Damn. Low Ki baits him inside, and Bryan stumbles back in the ring. Okay, we’re ten minutes in and it’s been mat wrestling the whole time. They’re busting out some submissions I have never seen before though. Bryan looks to be working on Ki’s leg, but Ki kicks Bryan like a bitch. Low Ki heats it up with some step kicks, and Dragon bails. Bryan ignores his legwork, looking for a cross armbreaker back in the ring. Low Ki barely escapes Cattle Mutilation, and falls victim to a back suplex. Low Ki buys himself some time with a kick to the face. Dragon’s eyes bug out as he eats stiff shots to the back. Bryan avoids a Ki Clutch but falls victim to a hooked Cobra Clutch. Bryan bails out, but Ki keeps the hold in! Awesome spot, but the crowd doesn’t lift a finger. Back in the ring, Ki hits a double stomp. Ki looks for another one, but Bryan bridges! Ki’s like fuck no bitch and stomps him again. Bryan gets out of a Ki Crusher with a Roaring Elbow and nails a Dragon Suplex! One, two, thr—no. Dragon goes up top and hits a swandive headbutt. Low Ki whips Bryan in the corner, hits a kick combo, and a Dragon Suplex for 2! Low Ki puts on Cattle Mutilation! Dragon slides through and puts in a Ki Clutch! Dragon hits a Northern Lights Suplex for 2. Low Ki looks for a springboard crossbody but Dragon hits a dropkick! That gets a 2 count. Steve Corino says this is one of the best matches of all time, but damn it Steve, that’s stupid. Sorry man. Ki comes back with a brainbuster, and a flurry of his signature stiff kicks. Ki Krusher! One, two, thr—NO! Awesome nearfall. Dragon gets his knees up on a Phoenix Splash, but Ki would have eaten his knees anyway. Dragon gets 2 on a Dragon Suplex. Dragon goes up top and hits a super backdrop! That gets 2. I’m not feeling this match all too much. Dragon puts Low Ki up top again, but Low Ki clubs him and hits a super Ki Krusher! The ring is extra springy tonight, as they bounce straight up in the air. Dragon falls out of the ring to prevent a pinfall. Pinfall gets 2 as Dragon gets his feet on the ropes. Dragon catches a tidal wave and hits a capture suplex! One, two, thr—no. Cattle Mutilation! Low Ki passes out from the pain at 32 minutes. Anti-climactic…

Analysis: ***1/2 I liked this match. It certainly did not appeal to me as it did other fans, but I liked the work they put into it. the first 12 or so minutes got pretty tedious after it was all submission work without major work on any body part, but they turned it up a little bit when they sensed it was the time. And seriously, if you’re going to spend half the match doing submissions, have it lead somewhere ya know? It’s just wasted time if it doesn’t lead anywhere. Plus, I would have liked the nearfalls to be a little more believable here. Some of them had potential to be great, but for whatever reason they weren’t as impactful as need be. Plus, the crowd only popped for certain parts of the match. Other parts, they sat on their hands. Philadelphia always has mixed crowds, and these fans were the precise definition. Bryan and Ki deserve accolades for their work in the ring, but the psychology was lacking, the nearfalls weren’t believable, and the finish sucked, even if it put over Low Ki’s toughness. If you like this match more than I did, then cheers to you. I just didn’t dig it like everyone else seemed to.

Jay Briscoe vs. Mark Briscoe

From ROH’s Fifth Year Festival Finale. These two (awesome) brothers lost their tag titles the previous night to Naruki Doi and Shingo (in a ridiculously fun match) and decided they needed to man up, so this match was made. They had a couple great matches at Honor Invades Boston in 2002 and One Year Anniversary in 2003. Will they top themselves?

Duel “Let’s Go Briscoe” chant. HA! Jay gets a kick out of that.

We start with a tie-up, but it’s broken. Mark goes to work on Jay’s arm, but breaks cleanly when Jay gets to the ropes. Jay nearly puts in a cross armbreaker, but Mark gets to the ropes. Jay bitch slaps his brother, but Mark gets the upper hand on a test of strength, returning the bitch slap to his brother. Hard to believe these guys were only 22-23 here. Jay goes to work on Mark’s leg, but Mark crawls to the ropes. Mark maintains a side headlock on his brother after a back suplex. Mark breaks it and kicks Jay hard in the small of his back. Jay Cactus-clotheslines his brother to the outside, and they trade chops on the outside until Jay takes control. These guys are beating the hell out of each other. Mark whips Jay into the the guardrails, knocking a couple banners off in the process. Moonsault off the guardrails! Mark eats the guardrail after a very stiff strike exchange. Mark suplexes Jay on the aisleway! Back in the ring, Mark nails a spin kick to Jay’s jaw for a two count, soon after locking in a head-scissors. Jay fires back with forearms, and chops Mark off of a springboard. Mark shakes that shit off and hits a slingshot double stomp. Mark hits a springboard senton for 2. Jay comes back and hits a bodyslam and a leg drop for 2. Jay puts in a Japanese stranglehold. Mark makes an attempt at a comeback but eats a knee to the gut, stopping him dead. Mark comes back with an Exploder suplex for 2. Jay gets out of another one and hits a running boot for 2. The brothers trade strikes in the middle of the ring, until Jay kicks Mark out of the ring in mid-air! SOMERSAULT PLANCHA! Jay hits a frog splash back in the ring for a close 2 count. Mark KICKS out of a Jay Driller (not the pin, the set up) and puts his brother up top for a SPRINGBOARD CUTTER! One, two, thr—no! Mark nails a springboard corkscrew for a good two count. JAY REVERSES A SUPERPLEX INTO A GORDBUSTER! Awesome, awesome spot. Jay nails a Falcon Arrow! One, two, thr—MARK GETS THE ROPES! Jay starts wrenching heavily on a stretch plum and HITS A SICK LARIAT! ONE, TWO, THR—NO! Awesome nearfall. This is starting get hot. Mark nails an Exploder! One, two, thr—no! Mark shoves Todd Sinclair into the corner. Sinclair falls to his knees, and MARK JUMPS OFF HIM AND RANAS JAY OUT TO THE FLOOR! Holy SHIT. Mark covers Jay in the ring, one, two, thr—NO! Great nearfall there. They trade strikes in the middle of the ring. JAY DRILLER! However, Jay’s too exhausted to make the cover. Awesome match here. Jay cracks a smile and gets up! Mark falls on his ass after knocking Jay down with a forearm. MARK NAILS A CUT-THROAT DRIVER!! Mark can’t follow up due to exhaustion. The two brothers don’t answer the 10 count, so the match is ruled a draw at 27 minutes.

Analysis: ****1/2 Goddamn, what a war. These two absolutely bludgeoned each other throughout the whole match and wrestled a whole different match than their four star affair in 2002. They thought that they may be growing soft, so they just spent 30 minutes beating the holy hell out of one another. And even though I may be stuck in the minority, I thought the finish was really clever as it proved that even though they both beat the shit out of each other for varied lengths of time, they still had no way to prove who was better. It makes them both seem strong, which is critical in a tag team, especially as established as the Briscoe Brothers are. I think they had one match during the HDNet era, but I don’t know where to find it, so I’ll leave it alone. But yeah, if you want a stiff, back-and-forth, just balls-out war, then track this bad-boy down because the Briscoes were just as awesome in 2007 as they are now.

So there they are. I can’t give you a final analysis, but I can recommend all 6 matches to you because they’re all really good in their own way. The one that is probably mandatory viewing if you want to see the future of the WWE is Rollins-Ambrose, which is just a clinic. The least-greatest match is Low Ki-Danielson, which may tickle other wrestling fans to death, so don’t take my word for it. And by all means, track down Briscoe-Briscoe too. It’s just awesome. Did I ever mention I adore the Briscoes, in a non-gay way? Well, I do. They’re my favorite current wrestlers right now, along with Daniel Bryan. I just can’t say enough about Kobashi-Honda either. It’s just an exciting, tension-filled 25 minutes, with an exquisite—but simple—story being told throughout. That’s probably my 2^nd favorite match of the bunch.

Final Match Rankings:

Dean Ambrose vs. Seth Rollins (FCW TV, 9-18-11) (****3/4)

Kenta Kobashi vs. Tamon Honda (Pro Wrestling NOAH, 4-13-03) (****1/2)

Jay Briscoe vs. Mark Briscoe (ROH Fifth Year Festival: Finale) (****1/2)

Rey Mysterio vs. Chris Jericho (WWE The Bash) (****1/4)

Adam Pearce vs. Brent Albright (ROH Death Before Dishonor VI) (***3/4)

Low Ki vs. Bryan Danielson (ROH Round Robin Challenge 2002) (***1/2)